If this is your first time on Pursuing God’s Heart, Becoming His Friend (formerly En Courage), welcome!
Do these sound like something you’d say?
- I feel discontent about life but don’t know how to fix it.
- I’ve tried Christianity and it’s rules don’t work for me.
- I’ve tried to read the Bible but it makes no sense.
- I’ve tried church but it doesn’t seem to fit.
- I’ve wondered why it seems God can’t be pleased, even though I’ve tried.
- Life is hard and isn’t what I thought it would be.
- I long to follow Jesus but feel dry inside, and have a very long time.
If so you’ll find
- Articles that speak to those who seek God but haven’t yet arrived (like me)
- Stories of my walk of friendship with God through struggles and mountaintops
- Lessons I’m learning as I walk this path
- Resources for making your own discoveries about God as you and He become acquainted in new ways
With the promise
“If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.” (Love God)
Jeremiah 29:13 nlt
What you can expect
I’m currently posting about 4 times a month, and my posts vary from about 600-900 words. The pages are simple, and uncomplicated so as not to overwhelm.
I used to think I needed to gain God’s pleasure by keeping the ‘Christian check off sheet’ (all the rules good Christian girls keep).
I was one of those Christians who could come across as self-righteous, and didn’t always understand those who didn’t snap out of their struggles and just trust God.
If I missed a box on the check off, I felt guilty, but overall thought I was doing well, and found my value in being in church leadership, leading Bible Studies, and in church music. Until life began to fall apart big time:
- My husband and I adopted a beautiful five year old boy with autism, mood disorder, and attachment issues; and I discovered I had no clue how to parent him. The first straw came when I had to give up my leadership roles because I was too drained to lead anyone.
- As our son and I raged through puberty straw number two was placed on the load as my husband contracted and battled cancer for two years and lost.
- The last straw fluttered onto the pile as my family and facade unraveled when for my safety and his, I had to place my very angry fifteen year old son in voluntary placement against everything I’d said I’d do when I promised to be his mom forever.
The camel’s back broke under the load.
I was exhausted and worn both inside and out. The only thing that literally kept me sane was Jesus. I continued to keep up my “Good girl Christian list” not realizing my heart toward God had grown colder and harder. I’d even told God I’d suffered enough, and felt He owed me. God graciously held me anyway.
During this time, my brand new husband and I began attending a church where I heard for the first time, “When you meet Jesus, He’ll change your life. You’ll never walk away from Jesus the same as when you came. ” I’ve been in church and followed Jesus my whole life, and had never heard those words! That statement and the confidence with which these people spoke drenched cool water on my dry soul. I was too weary and these words proclaimed it wasn’t all up to me.
Jesus changes lives. Over time I’ve discovered the truth in this promise.
I make the same claim to you. When you meet Jesus, He’ll change your life. You’ll walk away different than when you came. I promise.
*NOTE: Please be aware this blog is currently undergoing transformation from the old format under ‘En Courage’ to this new format. The categories are also changing to better suit the new format. For the time being all new articles are under new categories not yet listed in the menu. I hope this isn’t too much of an inconvenience. Please feel free to contact me with any questions. My contact information is located in the “Contact Me” section as well as at the end of each post. I’d love to be of help outside this blog. I’m also considering making a private FB page just for those who’d like to meet like-minded people who long for change. Let me know what you think.